This weekend was my annual trip to the Missouri Valley Conference tournament. I came to the realization that I’ve been to 7 consecutive conference tournaments and 9 out of the last 11. It’s shocking to me how old I’m getting. I was there to cheer on my Alma mater, Missouri State, and consume mass quantities of alcohol. Pretending you are still a college student for 3 days a year is still socially acceptable I think.
Despite 12 years of missing the NCAA Tournament (hello Barry Hinson era) I had reason to be hopeful for the Bears chances this year. Coach Cuonzo Martin had the team playing well and they managed a 15-3 record and their first ever MVC regular season title. Things were looking up for the program. But the MVC was down this year as it has been recently and it was looking like a 1 bid league again. So the only way for the Bears to make the NCAA tournament was to win the MVC outright or sit on our (pretty weak) resume and pray for an at large spot.
Day 1
The Bears had the #1 seed in the tournament and drew Southern Illinois who is an absolutely terrible team and had just lost to MSU by 20 points. We weren’t worried. I kicked the day off at 9am with my old roommate Jon and served up some beer, mimosas, and bagels. Things were looking good for some epic belligerence. This game was a lot closer than it should’ve been. The Bears could not make a shot. It was awful. We actually left our seats in disgust with 2 minutes to go and the Bears down by 9. After a last second change of heart we stayed in the arena and watched the game from the SRO section. Thank God we stayed. The Bears finally put it all together and went on an 11-0 run to win the game 58-56. We were pumped but definitely worried about the next game. On the way out I think I managed to berate (good naturedly) both Springfield broadcasting “legend” Art Hains and former AD Bill Rowe. Good times.
Now the fun really started. We met one of my coworkers (an SIU alum) in the Scottrade garage to gloat and do a little post-game drinking. They all seemed relatively happy since this now means they can fire their coach Chris Lowery. Somehow (and this is where I’m getting hazy) we managed to get into a suite for the second game. Here’s the view:
Since there was free beer I was ready to hunker down for rest of the afternoon. That was until Jon said “Dude let’s get out of here.” I didn’t get it. Then he said “Let’s get out of here NOW!” Ok then. So we left and when we hit the street I realized why. Jon proceeded to projectile vomit about 30-40 feet. I mean this was a rocket. Totally epic. We were also in a crowd of people so we got the hell out of there real quick.
Now let me tell you about Jon. His situation (read: WIFE) doesn’t allow him to drink very often so when he decides to throw down it usually goes horribly wrong. He even found out he had a curfew of 8pm (yes that is true) so he wanted to stay out longer. Which led to this:
He took a little nappy at Houlihan’s. But then he still wanted to stay out. So we ended up going to my new favorite bewb-tastic restaurant Show Me’s. It’s sort of like Hooters except the food is 100% inedible and the waitress are at least semi-attractive. Jon eventually gave up so we did manage to get him home by his curfew and spare me the wrath of another pissed off wife.
Day 2
The coeds were looking good on Saturday:
On day 2 I tore one off again. This time with my brother and dad. It was a similar story for Missouri State. They shot like crap and generally played poorly but still won. This time over Creighton 60-50. My dad can keep up with us (at least he thinks so) so it was a pretty good time. We took the Metrolink back to Show Me’s to see the sights then we went to Morgan Street and had some drinks and (possibly?) danced around like idiots. Soon we had to send daddy back home to St. Charles County on the train. He was done for.
This would’ve been a good place to stop but since we had to miss Mardi Gras this year we called a few people over to my house for a Hurricance. Somehow this lasted until 2am. Not a good idea. A (nameless) few of us were non-functional by Sunday.
Day 3
By day 3 I was dogging it and so was everybody else. We met up with about 10 people who had driven in from various parts of the state to see this championship game. They would have to face the long drive home disappointed.
Again the Bears looked like garbage. After shooting 19% in the second half (yes that is accurate) they somehow still had a chance to win. But Jermaine Mallet dribbled the ball off his foot with 3 seconds left for the turnover. Talk about a kick in the stomach.
So now we sit on the bubble again. Yahoo, Pat Forde, Joe Lunardi and The KC Star have us out of the NCAA tournament. It could be the 4th snub in 12 years for these Bears. That sucks.
March 7th, 2011
Tonight is the beginning of an annual tradition. A weekend when I get together with my old college roommate and we head down to the Scottrade Center to cheer on our alma mater Missouri State at Arch Madness.
While this should be an occasion to catch up, watch some mediocre basketball, and talk about the good old days it always ends up a belligerent drunkfest in which we curse, booze, and quite possibly violate some minor civil ordinances. Generally we act like we’re 19 years old instead of in our mid to late 20′s. This year I’m going to try to avoid the Boone’s Farm and Keystone Light.
Here’s a couple pictures I dredged up from MVC Tournaments past:
March 5th, 2009
Ever since I moved back to St. Louis in 2004 I have had split-season Rams tickets. At the time I was a casual fan at best and since the Rams didn’t move to St. Louis until 1995 I had always felt like a baseball fan in disguise when I watched them play. But season tickets sounded like fun and a good excuse to spend time with my Dad and drink massive quantities of alcohol at 8am. As perfect a Sunday as I could imagine.
In 2004 the two Super Bowl appearances were still fresh in my mind and with Mike Martz at the helm I thought another appearance was imminent. It was not to be. Martz was shown the door soon after and the Rams have become the laughingstock (ok second to the Lions) of the League.
My Dad no longer attends games with me and I can’t drink nearly as much as I could 4 short years ago. In the 4 regular season games I attended the Rams went 0-4 and weren’t even competitive for the majority of the season. For this “privilege” I shelled out nearly $750 for my 2 seats.
My season recap:
New York Giants L 41-13
This was the Home Opener so I was pretty pumped even considering we had been destroyed by the Eagles the week before. My brother (who is still partially in college mode) came with me so I was trying mightily to keep up with him on the $9 beers which is probably why I remember mostly nothing about this game. What stands out for me is going to Hooters after the game and closing that place down at 11pm. That’s right 12 solid hours of drinking. God knows how much we tipped but all we got out of it was our waitress telling us she “was kinda into girls”. Perfect. For any of you in St. Louis you know taking the Metrolink home at this hour is out of the question. We had to hustle through the vacant (and dark) streets of downtown to find a cab and get our butts home safely. Luckily our cab driver made a few wrong turns and was quite possibly tweaking on meth. He also said Ryan Ludwick was potentially the NL MVP. Clearly he was doing some kind of drugs. It’s not a coincidence that many of my memories from this season do not center on the games themselves.
Buffalo Bills L 31-14
In Scott Linehan’s final game before they (finally) kicked him to the curb the Rams were embarrassed once again. Linehan departed with a stellar 11-25 record as Head Coach. My only memory from this game was the crowd. Let me say that my seats are relatively decent so I’m not sure how some of these hoosiers get down there but there they were. About 2 rows in front of me were two guys in Buffalo t-shirts. Clearly a father-son team with working class roots — maybe union pipe fitters or something. These guys were hammered beyond belief and kept screaming the same thing: “BUFFA-LO! BUFFA-LO!” for 3 hours. It was truly painful. I think we left after 3 quarters.
Chicago Bears L 27-3
Games against the Bears are always annoying. During these games a sea of Bears fans descends upon St. Louis. Sometimes it seems like there are more Bears fans than Rams fans. They’re certainly louder than Rams fans. This generally leads to an away game atmosphere at The Dome especially when Chicago is dominating. After the half Bears fans began filtering in from the rafters to replace the early departing fans. A group of 4 hooligans sat right behind us and began harassing everyone who was leaving early. I hate leaving early but this team has been painful to watch! So we bit the bullet and left in the early 4th quarter. And yes we got hassled by 4 drunken turds from Chicago whose team is going nowhere. Oh well.
Seattle Seahawks L 23-20
This game was a playoff for which 2-11 team would reside in the NFC West cellar. I believe my friend Jon specifically picked this game to attend because hey “we might actually win this one”. We didn’t. Besides a sweet Bulger to Holt touchdown the Rams played pretty poorly. This was hidden by fact that the Seahawks are truly godawful. Seneca Wallace has no business being an NFL quarterback. We thought this one was in the bag until Seattle tied it up with 5 minutes remaining. We knew the Rams would blow it so we left early (again this was painful). By the time we got to Hooters for a postgame pitcher it was over. A last second field goal sealed it. And the Rams go 0-4 in games I attend this season.
In case you think I just stare at cheerleaders all game (which I do) here’s how I break down the season: OJ Atogwe, Donnie Jones, and Josh Brown are the only players who are worth a damn. Jason Craft had a couple moments and I’d like to see Kenneth Darby (from Alabama!) get a shot at the second HB position next year. Chris Long had a decent rookie year. The rest of the team should be burned to the ground. The Rams should try to hire Mike Singletary, Bill Cowher, or Steve Spagnuolo as Head Coach, draft Andre Smith (Alabama again!) or Matthew Stafford, and fire the entire front office. I mean everyone!
Yes I’ll be shelling out the cash for season tickets again next year. I love Sunday afternoons at The Dome too much! C’mon on Rams do something this offseason!
December 17th, 2008
With the news that the SEC has placed 5 times in the top 10 of the AP College Football Rankings the argument is over: The SEC plays the best football around. While I have friends who are fans of the Big 12 and Pac-10 I prefer a conference where the defense is tough, the coaches are excellent, and winning is expected.
I’ve been an Alabama fan since my Dad plopped me down in front of the TV at the age of 2. While Alabama has had a few down years recently they’ve hired a great coach in Nick Saban and are ranked #9 after smacking around Western Kentucky on Saturday. The conference schedule will be tough and whoever does end up taking it deserves to be in the Natinal Championship game.
The SEC has five (5!!) coaches that have won a National Title – Saban, Meyer, Miles, Spurrier, and Fulmer. Another – Tuberville – had a 13-0 team in 2004 but didn’t get to play for the title.
The last two National Championships have been won by SEC schools – LSU and Florida
I love the SEC and I’m mainly writing this post because Matt has been pissing me with his pro-Mizzou garbage. Let there be no doubt if Mizzou played Georgia they would give up 90 points. It’s tough to live in a place where nobody knows enough about college football to have a decent conversation.
September 16th, 2008
With the 2nd pick in the NFL Draft the St. Louis Rams selected DE Chris Long from the University of Virginia. All week it has been reported that the Rams would select either Long or LSU DT Glenn Dorsey. The toughest defense in college football is always played in the SEC and I’ve seen Dorsey dominate punks all year long so I was hoping he would be the pick.
I was mildly disappointed when Long’s name was announced but after watching some video I’m feeling a little better. Long is a big, strong, and athletic end. He is the son of Hall of Famer Howie Long so he has a good pedigree and there’s probably a 60% chance that he’ll rock a sweet flat top at some point.
Glenn Dorsey fell to the Kansas City Chiefs at #5. Dorsey will be a solid NFL pro and the Chiefs are having an exceptional draft so far .
Chris Long will hopefully shore up a porous Rams defense and help the club rebound from an awful 3-13 campaign. Head Coach Scott Linehan’s head will be on the chopping block if they don’t.
April 26th, 2008
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